Election Day

So we've got this big election coming up Tuesday with possible shifts in the balance of power and the executive agenda possibly at stake.  Everybody is so stirred up we have The View co-hosts calling certain female candidates the B word and declaring that they are destined for hell.  Conservative groups actually calling Hispanic voters and encouraging them not to vote at all. This is what we've come to in America.  Michelle Obama and I are at opposite ends - for the first time in my life, I'm not proud to be American and am actively afraid of my government.  This must be what it would be like to be invited to dinner with Hitler and Stalin.  I mean, who do you sit by?  Do you say, well I'm a little bit conservative so I identify more with the fascist dictator, or I'm a little left of center so I'll sidle up to the communist butcher?  Go to the polls on Tuesday and I think that's the choice that's going to be facing you.

I'll go back to humor and whining next time...

Hey, if I only I have one person reading my blog, wouldn't it make better since to just call them?

I was going to blog about my procrastination problem today, but I've decided to put it off until next week.

Random Muse

Some random thoughts from my life recently:
1. $2400, an MRI, an x-ray, 3 doctors, 4 excruciating physical exams and 14 hours do not guarantee that you can find out why your shoulder doesn't work;
2.  A cortisone shot feels like a bayonet being rammed into your shoulder and then jalapeno butter pumped in behind it;
3.  Cortisone shots are overrated;
4.  Employees undergoing chemotherapy do not care that your shoulder hurts;
5.  Middle school cheerleader coaches would have been excellent officers in the Third Reich;
6. Street sweepers are about as effective as dusting, but much louder;
7.  Cellophane can be used to simulate cell phone static;
8.  I have a friend whose husband thinks something is wrong with her phone;
9.  Add one more couple in my acquaintence with a cheater amongst them to the list;
10.  NFL quarterbacks should not take pictures of their privates with a cell phone;
11.  For that matter, neither should anyone else.
12.  Cell phones are the death of cheaters, see no. 9.
13.  No. 8 and No. 9 are not related subjects.
14. If two middle school girls were on death row, they would inevitably swear never to speak to the other again for the rest of their life, or the other's execution, whichever comes first;
15.  Some middle school girls would cause less trouble if they were on death row;
16.  Who is Snooki and why is she important?
17.  For $5000 Newt Gingrich will name you Business Person of the Year and invite you to D.C. to watch the election returns;
18.  I will not be named Business Person of the Year in 2010;
19.  NPR fired Juan Williams for being racist.  Seriously. And,
20.  I can write down 20 random thoughts in less than 3 minutes.

Me Blog?

My soon to be ex-friend Lisa is making me do this!!! Soooo, if I've never really written a blog, nor read a blog, but am somewhat aware of what a blog is, this makes me qualified to blog?  Apparently so. I don't know what I'm going to blog about.  So far, the blog appears to be a cyber-Seinfeld episode: the blog about nothing.  Ok, I'm warming up now. Umm, this is what's on my mind today:  I feel distracted and detached, but things seem to be going well on most fronts, my shoulder really hurts and surgery is looming, followed by rehab and is this going to affect my sex life? My friends are acting weird.  My kids seem to be doing great.  Business sucks!!!! I read an obit yesterday where the family asked that, in lieu of flowers, donations be made to "whoever is running against Barack Obama."  Are you kidding me? We now have politcal action committees chaired by dead people?  I mean, I knew they voted, but fundraising?  Do I have any couple friends who are not cheating on each other or otherwise about to get a divorce?  Doesn't seem so.  Last night I'm in bed and I'm told: did you know that so and so's husband cheated on her with a 300 pound woman?  My answer: No, and now I wish I still didn't know.  Why do they keep pushing back clock resetting day, whatever its called? If anyone deserves an extra hour's sleep, its moi.  I wish I spoke better French.  Just got back from there, spent 8 days and still can't order anything but pizza.  Why would anyone, French or not, put goat cheese on a pizza?  To satisfy the insistence of a friend, I watched an entire Nascar race on Sunday and I want those 3 hours of my life back.  My daughter, for whom I refuse to pay for a pedicure, can paint her toes to look exactly like she got a french one, white tips and all.  Eleven year olds are amazing.  Her older brother barely can brush his teeth regularly or properly. Or locate his car keys every freaking morning.  I have 27 female employees.  That thing about women who work together cycling together, ummm, that's true.  And apparently this week is the Tour de Bitch.  I DO NOT FACEBOOK! DON'T ASK ME AGAIN!  Eight years of higher education, seven moves and some therapy to forget all those people!!

Is anyone out there?  Cujo?

Drawing blanks here.  Until next time...